Just one of those days…

June 17, 2009 at 8:07 pm 2 comments

Today I keep thinking about when I was big, and depressed, I would say to myself “if I were thin, I wouldn’t be this way.” And here I am, 2 years later, still “this way”. Crazy as a loon. Popping Klonopin like there’s no tomorrow.

It just never stops. And now that I’ve gained like 15 pounds (or more), it’s driving me up the wall. I stand in front of the closet and cry, literally, like a fit-throwing child that can’t fit into their favorite dress anymore.

We all have these days. Mine just keep getting darker, and darker. I called my psychiatrist and made an appointment, though really, deep down, I know I won’t take any more of the antidepressants she’s prescribed me because I have this sneaky feeling that Celexa helped me pack on this extra fluff. It’s always easy to blame anyone but myself, right? But still. Why add fuel to the fire?

It’s just one of those days…all I want is reruns of True Blood and many, many naps.

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Entry filed under: fixing my brain, regain is lame, the aftermath. Tags: , , , .

I need to work on my coffee-snobbery. Summer…

2 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Shira  |  June 17, 2009 at 11:35 pm

    Are you me? I seriously feel like I’m reading myself!

    Reply
    • 2. Griffin H. Bat  |  June 18, 2009 at 8:48 pm

      Noo, but I wish I was! Want to trade places?

      Reply

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000wp

Griffin H. Bat was very, very fat. She had WLS in 2007 and has gone from 314 pounds to 120ish, and often wonders where her mind went along with all that gooey adipose matter. Even with new guts, she still thinks about cupcakes and their confectionary goodness. She feels like a bear that has lost its stuffing, but she won't hesitate to tell you how lovely you are.


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