The beach, buffets, and big bikinis

June 8, 2009 at 7:55 pm 2 comments

So the beach was interesting. On the first night we were there, of course we had to hit up the closest seafood buffet. And with my, uh, special needs, I wasn’t really looking forward to it. I hate crab legs.

So imagine my surprise when the buffet price was $25 per person. Uh, no. I asked if I could pay the child’s price, and I explained my situation. And then the typical thing happened: they give you the up-and-down glance, the “really? what a freak!” kind of shifty glance, and then they ask me if I have my surgeon’s card.

Um, no. I never asked for a “card”. I had surgery 2 years ago. I’m really not comfortable asking them to bend their rules for me. I never have, not once. But this time…it was either go to the buffet, or eat sand. So I asked. Because, seriously, 25 bucks…there’s no way I could eat that much. They let me pay the child’s price, at $11. I probably ate $5 worth, haha. But it was nice of them.

So I think I’ll dodge buffets from now on, unless I line my purse with Ziploc bags. =)

As for the swimsuit/baring my jiggle to the world: well, it wasn’t fantastic. I looked in all directions before taking off the cover-up. But really, no one LOLed or gasped or started crying from the horror, the horror. To be perfectly honest? I saw a LOT of gals in teeny-bikinis that, let’s face it, should have probably gone with something else. I’m not here to judge, but…5 minutes (seemingly) after having a baby, or still while hugely pregnant (I saw both), you should probably reconsider the two piece suit/dental floss. And after the age of 60, the Pink-brand-monokini is probably a bad idea.

I’m sure they probably said the same thing of me: “Oh my God, she NEEDS to be covering up that weird saggy-leg thing going on and those bat wings! A full body suit would do…”

Anyway, it was fun. I got in the ocean. Sort of. I hate the squishy feeling of stray seaweed wrapping around my toes. And the stray jellyfish, floating next to me…I got in the ocean, that’s what matters. So what if it was only 15 minutes?

Pictures, eventually. I took my Holga…and I’m lazy, so it might take a while to go get it developed.


Entry filed under: the aftermath. Tags: , .

The seafood buffet, thine enemy. Since when are libraries “cool”? I don’t like this.

2 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Shira  |  June 8, 2009 at 10:41 pm

    The Holga sounds so cool. I’ve always wanted to photograph aesthetically, but of course it’s always overposed for me. At least with weddings you can have an aesthetic.

    Good for you on the beach! I can’t expose my scars yet, but I’ll be in a bikini yet!

    • 2. Griffin H. Bat  |  June 9, 2009 at 6:13 pm

      Weddings are sooo boring, though, seriously. Everyone looks the same and everyone has that “my mouth has a hanger in it” thing going on. I needed a break from monotony. Hence, the toy camera. And pictures of giant, campy statues at the beach. Hehe.


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Griffin H. Bat was very, very fat. She had WLS in 2007 and has gone from 314 pounds to 120ish, and often wonders where her mind went along with all that gooey adipose matter. Even with new guts, she still thinks about cupcakes and their confectionary goodness. She feels like a bear that has lost its stuffing, but she won't hesitate to tell you how lovely you are.

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