The beach, buffets, and big bikinis

So the beach was interesting. On the first night we were there, of course we had to hit up the closest seafood buffet. And with my, uh, special needs, I wasn’t really looking forward to it. I hate crab legs.

So imagine my surprise when the buffet price was $25 per person. Uh, no. I asked if I could pay the child’s price, and I explained my situation. And then the typical thing happened: they give you the up-and-down glance, the “really? what a freak!” kind of shifty glance, and then they ask me if I have my surgeon’s card.

Um, no. I never asked for a “card”. I had surgery 2 years ago. I’m really not comfortable asking them to bend their rules for me. I never have, not once. But this time…it was either go to the buffet, or eat sand. So I asked. Because, seriously, 25 bucks…there’s no way I could eat that much. They let me pay the child’s price, at $11. I probably ate $5 worth, haha. But it was nice of them.

So I think I’ll dodge buffets from now on, unless I line my purse with Ziploc bags. =)

As for the swimsuit/baring my jiggle to the world: well, it wasn’t fantastic. I looked in all directions before taking off the cover-up. But really, no one LOLed or gasped or started crying from the horror, the horror. To be perfectly honest? I saw a LOT of gals in teeny-bikinis that, let’s face it, should have probably gone with something else. I’m not here to judge, but…5 minutes (seemingly) after having a baby, or still while hugely pregnant (I saw both), you should probably reconsider the two piece suit/dental floss. And after the age of 60, the Pink-brand-monokini is probably a bad idea.

I’m sure they probably said the same thing of me: “Oh my God, she NEEDS to be covering up that weird saggy-leg thing going on and those bat wings! A full body suit would do…”

Anyway, it was fun. I got in the ocean. Sort of. I hate the squishy feeling of stray seaweed wrapping around my toes. And the stray jellyfish, floating next to me…I got in the ocean, that’s what matters. So what if it was only 15 minutes?

Pictures, eventually. I took my Holga…and I’m lazy, so it might take a while to go get it developed.